reasons I would want people to come up and talk to me

these are the vibes I'm going to be putting out

#1- I remind you of the child you never had and you want me to inherit your vast estate

#2- you've heard of my juggling prowess and would like a demonstration (you are easily impressed by basic juggling)

#3- you like my yellow shirt

#4- you need someone to interpret the poems of DH Lawrence. I wrote a paper about this in college once and got an A and DH Lawrence has never shown up in my life again NOT EVEN ONE TIME!

#5- I look like a safe person

#6- You are going to clue me in on a big big fun fun secret

#7- You want someone to do a funny bit with 

#8- You are like, "you have a really unique aura." And I'm like "unique how?" And you say, "have you ever seen the polar express" And I say, "No only memes of it. Does that movie talk about auras?" And you say, "No I was trying to change the subject." And I go, "Oh okay well, sorry." And you have a sort of haunted far-off look and I say, "Am I gonna die soon?" And you say, "What makes you think that?" And I say, "my aura?" And you say, "No your aura looks like you would react the same way to being poked in the stomach as the pillsbury doughboy"

#9- friendship

#10- the DH Lawrence thing again because as I was writing this I remembered it more and more and I don't even think I've heard another human being say his name out loud and maybe it wasn't even real at all and I dreamed the whole thing