hyacinth

 I think words are like a costume. You say certain words because you want to appear a certain way to the people around you. You want to reinforce that image to them and maybe even yourself. I guess that's what affirmations are. 

Some words aren't for me. Some words aren't for me to use. No not that word. I mean words like hyacinth. 

Every once in a while in my life I've encountered people who are entitled to the word hyacinth. Usually women. A man who uses the word hyacinth is incredibly dangerous. I should clarify that I mean outside of its strict botanical meaning. I mean a man who uses hyacinth in a figurative sense or to evoke a specific image. 

Women who use hyacinth are usually well-read poetry types who probably had a few close friends growing up and had enough emotional intelligence to realize that other kids didn't like them or understand them but they themselves were okay with that and accepted it for what it is. 

Today my fake burger meat was like a pink puddle instead of the normal patty shape consistency but I ate it anyway and so far it seems like I got away with it.

my sister got the pharmacy residency she wanted!

 yay Erin! I'm so proud of her! She works so hard and is such a great person!!!

here's what happens to plastic bottle caps

 a plastic bottle cap is born when it is pooped out of a machine and then mechanically attached to plastic bottle. then it sits in a store for what feels like forever because a plastic bottle cap has no sense of time. but it's also no amount of time and also forever. Then the drink gets purchased by me Andy and I consume the liquid and turn it into me but get rid of most of it where it ends up in the water cycle and probably the carbon cycle a little bit too. And maybe the dirt cycle. Anyway I keep the bottle cap and put it in my junk drawer by my coffee machine to mature and gather energy.

Once it has sat long enough and the weather gets nice then I take it out of the drawer and use a sharpie to inscribe an ancient and future rune on it and put it in a bag with other bottle caps that have undergone a similar process.

Now that bag sits on my shelf until I decide to take it to the rock climbing gym where it sits in the setter's closet and gathers energy there. 

I know what you're thinking. How's he going to save the world? How will this save the world?

Guess what, idiot. The world doesn't need saving. Because the world is the world and can't be destroyed in any meaningful way. That's where the bottle caps come in. One bottle cap is special and will be cast forward into time where it will absorb energy from the sinister sun that will appear next to our regular sun out of nowhere ten thousand years in the future. The sinister sun can destroy the Earth in a meaningful way.

But because I've sent the bottle cap forward in time to absorb energy from the sinister sun, it can return back to the present and incubate inside the Earth like a vaccine. And the Earth will develop antibody bottle caps that will sprout out of trees when the sinister sun radiation hits. Those bottle caps will destroy the sinister sun and fulfill the prophecy.\

I don't really know though your guess is as good as mine.

thank you crab! I do help the children be in the sky!

For the past two weeks I've felt like I've been on the verge of getting sick but it never fully hit and today I feel like I'm out of it and more in my body and brain than I have been. So that's good.

good good good.

was coaching all weekend

 Definitely my proudest moment in coaching with the comp team. This feels like the first year where I really understood what the Regionals competitions test and was able to apply that directly to the training. The kids work so hard and care so much and they were able to do their best climbing on the day OR they've gotten so good that even having an "off" day still let them reach their goals.

It was a big moment and I think the team is only going to get better while staying true to having fun. 

a true mark of distinction

 is to wear socks adorned with the likenesses of animals upon them. For everywhere you tread you will signal to all with eyes to see that you are aligned with the beasts of the earth, and the flying things, and the critters of the deep.

I hate crowds. I like people.

I ain't down with the plague but I'm cool with the beetles and bugs.

-Jesse Welles 

here's my anti-infantilization message

let's stop acting like we can't believe it when one day it's hot and the next day it's snowing.

I know. It's a big change. It feels sudden.

But surely we can imagine more. Surely anyone over the age of 12 or so has seen enough weather changes in the Spring to know that this type of thing can and does happen.

Let's broaden our imagination a little bit to consider a world without cars perhaps. Or not paving over large swaths of land to create heat islands and useless stupid infrastructure. Or put plants on roofs and stuff. 

I don't want to keep playing the tutorial and level one every time. Let's get to level two. Maybe try out level three? I don't know. Could be fun.