One time I remember I was taking this Shakespeare class with my favorite professor I had in college and we were reading Othello and this guy Othello ends up lying to his wife, Desdemona, and his life kind of unravels from there. But I remember there was a specific point in the play that our professor pointed to that was the moment Othello distrusts his wife and he talked about all the implications of that moment. I ended up emailing the professor because I found an earlier example in the play, maybe the first moment Othello speaks to Desdemona, that he could be considered lying. 

And I gave him the example and he responded with something defending his point and the logic of it and I was like 'yeah okay you win.' But I'll never forget that I saw him in class and he asked about it and I said, 'yeah you made a good point.' and he said, 'you believed that?'

Something to that effect. It never occurred to me until that moment that I could've been right or that I could have challenged his response. 

The other thing I loved about that professor is he would give very short quizzes on tiny slips of paper about the assigned reading and he would ask about the tiniest, seemingly trivial, details. Stuff you would never think of as important. And then during the lecture he would show how these tiny details were actually crucial to the themes and messages of the work. I remember it was annoying at first but then I took it as a challenge. He also loved to talk about etymologies and ask about obscure words in the text. 

He was a cool guy. Professor Savage. One time a student used the word 'savage' and he immediately interrupted them and said, 'that's an unfortunate choice of words'. Like he was really hurt by hearing it used in its normal context. 

you're like an apartment with plants inside of it

 One way to approach being a human is thinking about yourself as an apartment with plants inside of it. 

The apartment is your outside body and the plants are your inside body aka your spirit, your soul, your internal experience, your organs, your innards, and your viscera.

Isn't it kinda crazy that there's a little electrical current or spark or whatever that keeps your heart pumping and makes your brain work. electricity?? in your body? how'd it get in there? how do we pass it on? Electricity comes from a wall outlet not from your body. 

Anyway you gotta arrange your plants to get the proper amount of sun. Too much sun, plants get sunburned and shrivel up. Too little sun, plants don't grow as good. 

Are your blinds shut? Has the roof of your apartment been torn off and is completely exposed to the elements? Have you completely blocked off all entrances and exits to your apartment so nothing can get in or out? Do you have the right kind of plants for growing indoors? And let's not even start with watering. 

Andy why do you think you make so many analogies to plants and why do plants play such a large role in externalizing your experience? 

You'd probably think it's because I take care of them and there's a clear relationship between what I do and how the plants are doing but you'd be wrong because that's not the reason. The reason I do it is because it's correct in an absolute Kantian sense. 

But don't you think self-help is a kind of bankrupt genre of writing that is trying to put a band-aid over atomization and the loss of community and shared cultural experience? It's just another example of putting risk and responsibility on the individual. In what world does it make sense that a person born into a world and community without their consent be judged insufficient and denied community and food and water?

Growing up this idea of personal responsibility was very important and I agree that it makes sense in a lot of ways but I have this memory of it being set against the idea of 'you can't just give people things without making them work for it or testing them some way.' Society is a pyramid and the people at the top are at the top because they're the best people. If you tried to make it a square or a rectangle or whatever it wouldn't work. And it's so blatant and undeniable now that the excesses we were warned about are all at the top. We didn't filter power and responsibility to the most deserving. The most powerful hoarded it all for themselves. None of this is new, obviously. I think part of me wanted to be in denial. 

One thing I'm trying to process is the difference between personal responsibility as it relates to being a productive part of a system that lets a complete idiot become the richest man in the world and personal responsibility that participates as much as needed to still have a life that is meaningful to me. 

I got called 'a shiny light of happiness' today at work

 And where I come from THAT'S PRETTY GOOD!

A favorite bit I like to do at coaching is saying 'that's pretty good where I come from!'

And they say 'where do you come from?'

And I say, 'Harrisonburg.'

Responding to Crab's Comments:

March 2nd: I can fix you. The blog can fix you.

February 26th: I'll check out Caligula's Horse, specifically In Contact!

February 23rd: This guy is still doing BAD.

February 23rd: I think they're cancelling taxes this year on account of the government actively casting off any possible credibility and legitimacy.

every season can be split into two distinct halves and the halfway point is a holiday

Winter: Early winter starts after Thanksgiving and is before Christmas and New Years. Late winter is after and runs until roughly St. Patrick's Day or Daylight Savings starting.

Spring is split by Easter and runs until Memorial Day.

Summer is split by July 4th and runs until Labor Day.

Fall is split by Halloween and runs until Thanksgiving.

For Summer and Winter, the early part is a fun time of transition and change. 

As I'm writing this I'm also realizing that the solstices and equinoxes also play similar roles to everything I'm describing but I would argue that those are slightly off and the real noticeable changes happen around the holidays. 

Late half of Summer and Winter is where they really go whole hog.

Is this anything? Season commentary? Talking bout how late summer feels? 

Here's my new idea. If you've stuck it out this far. 

Early Winter- everybody works. We've gotta get ready for the holidays. Commercial activity has to take place. Whatever we can get done from Thanksgiving to New Year's. That's working time.

Late Winter- No working. Work shuts down. It's too cold. The days are too short. You have to rest and recover and sleep.

Early Spring- No working. The weather is too fickle. You've gotta wake up slowly. Maybe a little bit of work. Maybe. 

Late Spring- Working. Nature is reviving. Blooming. The world is green again. Full of energy. The sun has returned. Time to be passionate and thriving.

Early Summer- No working. You've gotta have fun. If not now, when? When will you have fun? 

Late Summer- No working. It's too hot! Are you kidding? No way. Keep having fun. It's growing season.

Early Fall- Working. Harvest time. It's cooling down just a little bit so you can think again. Be productive.

Late Fall- You could make a strong argument for working here BUT you gotta remember that we already committed to working in early Winter and so if we work in Late Fall that's three working periods in a row and that's crazy. Maybe you can choose if you would prefer to work Late Fall or Early Winter but not both.

Anyway so that's my 8 blocks of the year: 3 of which include working and 5 of which don't. I think if we implemented this system everyone would be more meaningfully productive and happier and everyone but the bloodsucking demons would be better off.

today I learned about professional wrestler, Ryusuke Taguchi

 AKA Masked Horse

His origin story is that he was abandoned by his parents and raised by horses. Then, he was abandoned by those horses and raised by a professional wrestler.

And isn't that really the story of everyone's lives? At some point you move out and leave your parents and work and/or live for some thing and then eventually you have to leave that thing and be with some other third thing. 

Baker Mosquito: guy who was taken in by mosquitoes and then abandoned and taken in by Baker mosquitoes.

Croc Fisher: Guy who was used as bait for gator fishing gets eaten by gator and ends up fishing for gator bait in gator's stomach.

Whale Salesman: Guy who sells whales ends up being sold to whales to sell guys to other whalesman.

Bird Porch: Guy builds a porch for birds on his regular porch but the birds build a bigger porch on the bird porch and rebrand his porch the man porch.

Italian Werewolf: Guy is bit by an Italian and cast out from society for his transformation and falls in with a werewolf commune who use him to help invade the were-italian base.

I met a woman today who was mad about the state of the world

 but she also wanted to be mad. she would've been mad no matter what state the world was in.

I am sometimes reminded by the world that you can never go 'full bitter'.