Oh how I hate the wind. Air. Normally one of my closest allies, turned into a screaming wall of force that rips the breath from my lungs and brings tears to my eyes. It makes my blood boil to see one of my friends turned against me. After running in the wind my face burns and my ears ring and my body feels tense all over. If I were to move to a place where it was windy all the time I would quickly disintegrate into a pile of dust and bones. I would go mad too. First madness, then dust and bones. Why do I hate the wind so much? Well, in addition to the reasons I've outlined I'll also say that when you're running into the wind it's like a nasty little gremlin or ghoul is pushing you back. And also it makes me have to spit a lot.
A horrible sight! A crying angry man thrashing his limbs down the sidewalk, cursing the heaves and spitting from side to side. Frothing at the mouth even! Terrible.
And then I try one of my little tricks. I smile and think to myself, "thanks, the wind. I love you so much. I'm having so much fun." But it's all a clever ploy. One day I'll lure the wind into a false sense of security and then banish it forever. That is my solemn vow and oath. The end.
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