Last Day of May

 Going to bed last night I felt completely exhausted. I think I fell asleep faster than I have in a long time. Woke up feeling pretty good and ended up being in a bit of a rush getting out the door. I was fully out of my driveway and in front of my house when I remembered that I left something I would need for the climbing team party I was going to directly after work. Instead of parking my car in the street I decided to back up and go back into my driveway. I misjudged the turn and ended up backing into the curb. I heard a crunch and some more crunching and I realized I truly goofed. Ended up with a fairly large crack on my passenger side rear bumper and hurried off to work. 

Today we hiked at St. Mary's Wilderness. It's probably my favorite hike we do at camp and the water was higher and faster than I'd ever seen it before. This was also the youngest group by far that I've taken on this hike. But they ended up doing great and everyone had a wonderful time. Hiking is great because there's a lot less thinking and planning involved. We just go out into the world, do the hike, drive back, and that's pretty much the whole day. 

I had a pretty great run on the gravel roads by camp and I was really happy that my achilles has recovered and I didn't end up missing that much running that I would have done otherwise. I'll still avoid spikes for a bit but I'm happy to only have one injury instead of two. I think without realizing it I pushed my wrist way too hard while climbing and also trying to do some rehab injuries. It hasn't been very sore but if I do certain small movements I'll get shooting pain up my wrist. I can tell there's some swelling and I've kept icing. I think with true rest it will heal up fairly quickly. I just haven't really been resting for the week that it's been hurting and I've let the pain get to the point where I don't want to mess around with it anymore. That sounds really bad but it's more annoying than anything. I'm not too worried about it. Mostly bummed that I won't be able to climb. It's weird because I can do some weight bearing movements without any pain at all but very small things that I don't even think about will make it freak out. 

Anyway, I was pretty upset about my car because I really want it to be in good shape and I know my dad worked hard on it and I felt bad for not being careful. But I called him and he said it was okay and that new cars are dent magnets and that's just what happens so that made me feel a lot better. I tried my hand at adding tape to the back side of it and I mostly got the gap in the crack to disappear. I think it will hold up and then maybe we can work on it at some point in the future. Yeah.

We're doing good. We're doing work.

coupla soggy sailors

coupla dapper dans

feels alright

 I've been a little angsty about my running since December because every time I've gone to the track to run a mile under 5 minutes it's felt really hard. And not too long ago and even when I was in college, if I was in good shape and feeling good I remember I could just go to a track and run one at will and it didn't feel particularly hard. It wasn't always easy but I didn't feel like I was all-out. 

Anyway I think it was creating a bit of a barrier so today my legs felt really good and I didn't have a workout planned and my calf still felt a little weird so I didn't want to do anything crazy hard but three miles into my run today I decided I felt good enough and the CHS track was on my way back so I should stop by and run a hard mile. Even though I was in heavier trainers and it was warm and I'd been climbing for 2 hours, why not just go to the track and run a hard mile. And I had my garmin that doesn't really give splits. 

So I ran a pretty hard 1600 in 5:02 and felt pretty good. The thing that I was really happy with is that I was guessing my splits and not really caring and just running with the appropriate rhythm. It was the effort that I remember those mile attempts being in the past. And even though I didn't break 5 I was a lot closer to doing it than I thought I would be. I let it happen instead of forcing it. I would rather run a low 5 and feel like that than be just under 5 and feel awful. Plus, now I have a lot of confidence in doing it again. So, we'll keep coming back to the hard 1600 as well as the hard 400 and try to have some fun this summer with running. here's hoping the calf comes around. and the wrist!

Summer Plans

 Coaching is winding down. Camp is starting up. I've made about 8 bamboo cups for the counselors. I think I have 3 or 4 more to make. One has been fully sanded and finished with the fractionated coconut oil I bought at wal-mart today. 2 or 3 others are fully sanded. Mostly sanded. The others are still a little rough and need some sanding and whittling to be done. It's been really hard on my wrist to do a lot of whittling and climbing. I might need to slow down.

Last week the right side of my body was really struggling. At the same time that my achilles was flaring up on Monday I was also dealing with some wrist pain. It made me a little anxious to run and to climb so that wasn't great. It was still a good week though because I got a little break from doing work at camp so I felt more rested. Also I was happy to get so many bamboo cups made and really streamline the process of making them. They're really fun to do and I think I'd like to continue making them throughout the summer and potentially into the fall. Maybe I could make some interesting ones and start putting stuff back on craigslist free stuff. Something about the warm weather just makes me love whittling.

I think I'd like to take and post a picture every day from camp this summer. It would be a nice way to remember this first summer out of covid. 

Tomorrow I'm going to work a little more on the cups. Help clear out some stuff out of the basement and dining room. Hopefully run without any pain. I might also climb. We'll see how I'm feeling. I also have to buy groceries and do laundry. 

Doing well!

my aunt pat sent me this. we were together the last time we saw paw paw. 

roses are red. low lying clouds are called fog

I want to have a really great summer

and be my best self for camp

I think I've got a good plan for coaching

Was writing out some ideas and I'm optimistic that practices can be much better. I was talking to a friend today about my job at afterschool and it made me appreciate how much autonomy I have as a coach. 

thinking about paw paw today

 on Friday will be two years since he's passed. I think about him a lot. He was just such a good person. It means a lot to remember him and think about the person he was and the impact he had on me.

open house at the pool

 slept in a good amount and then got up and drove out to the pool for an open house. It was a little rainy so not many people showed up but the people who were there seemed really happy about it and so that was good. I sat on the guard chair and whittled for about 3 hours. I talked a lot with Henry about the upcoming summer and memories of past summers. It was a good time. Then I came home and napped. Woke up at like 7:50 and decided I would still get my run in. 

I washed my sheets. That was good. Tomorrow I'd like to do a workout and get at least a little bit of climbing in and get groceries. I was also planning to go back out to the pool for the open house again. It kind of took up a large part of the day so I may not. We'll see. Tomorrow I think I'll do a hilly tempo run and finish up with more hills after. It's never a bad idea to do hills. 

I'm feeling good. It was kind of weird that I needed to nap today because I don't think I've had bad sleep this week but with my long days it's hard to feel fully recovered all the time. There's always more to be done. 

I'm really grateful and excited about my new car. It's the nicest car I've ever owned by far and it's really fun to drive. The paint looks so good! And it's just a really excellent car in general. I feel so fortunate.

one time I made unsolicited campaign posters for a guy I went to high school with

 

I think I've already posted these on this blog but here they are again. this is the best one.

the wetness scale

damp- that's the lightest one. just a hint of moisture.

moist- one step up from damp

soggy- I went back and forth over whether soggy is more wet than wet but decided that it's slightly less wet than wet.

wet- pretty much the middle but there are way more synonyms for things that are beyond wet

dripping- dripping is often paired with wet. "you're dripping wet" it's being so wet that the wetness is become drips. it's not like I have to spoonfeed you guys this stuff. I just think the commentary adds texture.

soaked/saturated- now we're getting into some serious wetness. something that's been completely submerged in a liquid. I think soaked and saturated are truly a tie

drenched- drenched is like soaked but the water was applied more forcefully

sopping- sopping is an appalling amount of wetness. you're causing a scene at this point. disrupting the peace.

waterlogged- one time in 4th grade we were doing a science experiment. I forget about what. I think it was making a potato float in water or something. Something about boats? We were putting stuff in tubs of water. Maybe it was cardboard. Who knows. Anyway, I've always been terrible at experiments and at some point whatever we were putting in the water refused to float at all and I will never forget that our teacher came over and said, "oh that's waterlogged." And ever since that day the term waterlogged has represented to me a terminal condition that one can never overcome. No amount of dryness can undo waterlogged. 

So anyway today on my run I was waterlogged.

Embrace the Dead Legs

 Something I intuitively realized about running or accidentally got right for a long time was that there are lots of benefits to be found in running when your legs and body are very tired. I did this for years and saw a lot of improvement and running was so new and there were so many boundaries to break and milestones to reach that I never questioned very much how I felt. Yeah I had bad runs and days when I felt bad but generally I would try pretty hard and I would never think of running less than my regular amount of mileage or skipping a workout if I was scheduled to do a workout.

Then around 30 or 29 or so I started rock climbing and I felt like my running had stalled out a little and I shifted to the idea that I could maximize my time by doing more auxiliary activities and training, especially if my legs didn't feel good. I would only run hard and a lot if my legs were feeling good. Otherwise I would take my easy days very easy and focus on climbing or stretching or mobility or weight lifting. My take away from those months is that I actually had it right the first time. Getting on Strava made me appreciate running mileage and using my training to achieve something and so I started trying hard again even when my legs felt bad. I cut out most of that auxiliary training and now I can say with some confidence that I'm in much better shape and that was a good move. 

I had talked myself into believing that my body had gotten so used to running mileage that I didn't need to do anymore and that I couldn't recover as fast as I used to so I had to give my body less miles and maximize my hard days instead. I think that can be sound advice but I've noticed much better results from slogging out 10 milers and doing workouts every other day even if I don't feel fully recovered. In fact, I think grinding out runs when I don't feel good is one of my biggest strengths as a runner. The more I do it the better I feel and the more confidence I gain in my fitness. I might have been depriving myself of something I'm actually very good at. So, here's to trying hard and running on dead legs.

little bamboo

coaching climbing

 we've got some kids who don't seem terribly interested in climbing and I think in reflecting on my day I'm fixating on it too much. it's not even like they're bad kids or anything. they just aren't very intrinsically motivated to climb and there isn't that much else to do at the gym. But anyway, I think it's silly to focus too much on some kids having a mediocre time and ignore the fact that some kids worked really hard and had fun today. 

I'm thinking about people who say their goal is to make a difference to one person. I think that's a really valuable mindset and I think I accomplished that today. The fact that I clocked in and went to work made climbing at least a little bit better for a kid than if I hadn't been there. But, also, in a much more selfish and arrogant sense, I want to make a difference for as many kids as possible. I think I can do better than one. 

Mark Wetmore has this little speech he gives in Running with the Buffaloes where he tells his team that he wants to give attention to all of them, he wants to give each person the attention they deserve to have the best experience they can, but also, that his priority because of his job and because of his limitations as a person is towards the top 7. And he kind of apologizes to the people that aren't at that level yet and tells them that they can be some day. 

I don't know, I guess you could look at that as kind of a mean thing to do but I also think he's just being honest. Like, he's trying to save these people some frustration by telling them upfront what he can and can't do. As opposed to saying nothing and pretending to be open to all of his athletes while clearly favoring the top 7. It's got me thinking that maybe it would be better, more honest, and helpful to tell kids and parents that our coaching and practices are great for kids who are intrinsically motivated and want to challenge themselves in climbing otherwise, it's not nearly as fun. 

I used to run into sort of a similar challenge at afterschool where I would say, hey I notice these kids all have a ton of different things that they are motivated by during different parts of the day and I really try to make myself available to those times when they are having fun and willing to share that experience with me. Some kids love to play in the woods, some kids love to draw, some kids love to play games in the gym, some kids just love to talk and make jokes and be funny. And the common thread was that none of those things felt forced. Everyone was participating and engaged because they wanted to be. You could feel the self-worth and efficacy rising in those moments--there was a tangible amount of individual and group pride.  

And then I would constantly get asked about these enrichment lessons. Why wasn't I making enrichment lesson plans? Why can't I make them be engaged about a thing I choose in a time and space I set?

I just don't think that's how people work. People are engaged by what they are engaged by. And, sure, there are tons of little tricks and tactics for making kids seem engaged and motivated by something but at the end of the day I think we're just teaching them to lie to themselves by doing stuff like that. I say all this in response to the idea that we could make climbing fun to a kid who doesn't find it fun. I think coaches and a team can facilitate and remove potential barriers to climbing and add an element of social motivation but I think there is some irreducible element of enjoyment and motivation that can't really be faked or hidden or ignored. It's like, at afterschool there were a ton of different ways to engage with different kids and while coaching...there's kinda one. And if it's not clicking then maybe it's just best to be upfront about that. It's not like we need to keep kids on. We have the demand from the community. 

Anyway, that's my ramble.

I think someone spilled cologne on the ground

 and I put my hands on the ground to look for my watch and now my hands smell like cologne/body spray

yuck yuck yuck

helped make this

I'm not kidding, hey for real, let's build a wall.

stinkbugs invented stink

bees invented being busy

slugs invented being moisturized and staying in their lane

death by excess

"the warmth and openness that he gave me when I would show him these horrible ideas that some 16 year old has really helped me shape my sound. because he didn't judge, he wasn't super critical on it-- he would give tips and things but he would allow me to figure out my sound and I really appreciate him for that."

-tyler the creator

I think I'm where I'm supposed to be doing what I'm supposed to do

one time these people were just smashing a car in the middle of the street

 one time when I was in like 5th grade or something I was playing in the street and these young people about halfway down the street were outside just smashing a car parked on the side of the road. Like they were on top of it and beside it and just wailing on it with like baseball bats and 2x4s and anything they could find. It was really loud and I was standing in the middle of the street just watching them.

And then my mom was like, "I better go say something to them."

And for some reason I was like, "mom! no! that's their business! don't bother them!"

And my mom was like, "no I need to say something."

And then it turned out the people were really nice and the car had broken down and they were just going to take it to the junkyard or something and they thought it would be funny to smash it first.

what a crazy time. why don't I see more people smashing up cars?