Which probably makes you think we went out to the woods somewhere or out in a nice field and had a picnic and played games or maybe we went...anywhere outside. Or maybe we saw...something green?
Nope. Sat in a room and watched a Powerpoint for about two hours.
How is that in any way a Retreat? Well, I thought of one way. It's a retreat in the sense that we are surrendering our will to this organization in their pursuit of enthusiastic members and quality good-time fun. Which is still pretty evil.
If something that is supposed to be good is mandatory...that's way more evil in my mind than something terrible that is mandatory.
Because at least the terrible thing makes sense. While you're toiling and breaking your fingers and burning your back in the hot hot heat, you can understand, Ohhh! I see why I didn't get a choice in doing this. This is terrible! No one would volunteer to dig a hole two miles into swampy earth for a fallout shelter because it is a terrible job and flies have laid eggs in my skin.
And then you have the added comradery of sharing the misery with everyone around you. You're all remembering the past when times were good. You're holding each other during the night terrors. You're dreaming of a better tomorrow where you create a yogurt brand that powers your country's olympic athletes. Obviously, you're doing to die. You're not getting out of here alive. But at least it all makes sense. You're a pawn in the overlord's master plan. He has you doing the things no one else would ever do. Doom is like a comforting blanket that holds you down in your sleep and bludgeons you with hunks of fetid ham.
But mandatory fun is like being trapped in a weird alternate dimension where capris pants are cool and captains can trap time in their body hair. I can't figure out how to move in this dimension. I just know that I'm intensely uncomfortable with all this unwarranted enthusiasm and good cheer. And you can look around the room but everyone else is just as confused.
How is that in any way a Retreat? Well, I thought of one way. It's a retreat in the sense that we are surrendering our will to this organization in their pursuit of enthusiastic members and quality good-time fun. Which is still pretty evil.
If something that is supposed to be good is mandatory...that's way more evil in my mind than something terrible that is mandatory.
Because at least the terrible thing makes sense. While you're toiling and breaking your fingers and burning your back in the hot hot heat, you can understand, Ohhh! I see why I didn't get a choice in doing this. This is terrible! No one would volunteer to dig a hole two miles into swampy earth for a fallout shelter because it is a terrible job and flies have laid eggs in my skin.
And then you have the added comradery of sharing the misery with everyone around you. You're all remembering the past when times were good. You're holding each other during the night terrors. You're dreaming of a better tomorrow where you create a yogurt brand that powers your country's olympic athletes. Obviously, you're doing to die. You're not getting out of here alive. But at least it all makes sense. You're a pawn in the overlord's master plan. He has you doing the things no one else would ever do. Doom is like a comforting blanket that holds you down in your sleep and bludgeons you with hunks of fetid ham.
But mandatory fun is like being trapped in a weird alternate dimension where capris pants are cool and captains can trap time in their body hair. I can't figure out how to move in this dimension. I just know that I'm intensely uncomfortable with all this unwarranted enthusiasm and good cheer. And you can look around the room but everyone else is just as confused.
You can ask them, "Are you having fun?"
They say, "I don't...think so...but we...have to...I think."
And you find some people who seem to be getting really into the presentation and the little mixers but suddenly they don't look like real people anymore. They've transformed into the Pink Elephants from that scene in Dumbo when he gets wasted.
And you're like, "What does this mean?! I want the mandatory fun to stop RIGHT NOW!"
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| I know exactly what that mouse is going through |
I guess my problem with it is that at least when something awful is mandatory, your only option is to try to make it fun. You can resist the bad and will the good.
But when something 'good' is mandatory, to give in to that just feels creepy and cult-ish. You're not choosing your own happiness at that point. You're just accepting. Which, maybe that's being too contrarian but I can't help but get a weird feeling from it. And even if you find a way to make it fun, it's impossible to tell the difference between your fun and their fun. Then that leaves me the job of resisting the fun and finding things to be mad about.
But when something 'good' is mandatory, to give in to that just feels creepy and cult-ish. You're not choosing your own happiness at that point. You're just accepting. Which, maybe that's being too contrarian but I can't help but get a weird feeling from it. And even if you find a way to make it fun, it's impossible to tell the difference between your fun and their fun. Then that leaves me the job of resisting the fun and finding things to be mad about.
Like the pink elephant parade. They're having fun but Dumbo can't control it. They're marching all over him and changing into stuff and playing music, "Hippety hoppity hippety hoppity!" but he's lost all control. You would never volunteer to be in the pink-elephant-parade fun in the same way that no one would volunteer to go to the Surrender-Retreat. So when they make it mandatory they're sort of taking the control away and putting on this mask of happy and saying, "Aren't you so glad you came?!"
No. You forced me to. Let's be honest about this. I would much rather show up and you tell me to scrub floors or do something than sit here and pretend to be excited about the Sun Chips you brought.
But that's just me.
1 comment:
I completely, absolutely agree with this, I feel the same way. There's no genuineness in situations like that, haha it would be so much better to be told to scrub floors or sweep or something.
Great post.
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