Guerrilla Chicken Restaurant Psychology

I got this text from a friend.

Him: Boberry biscuit [picture of biscuit on paper plate]

Me: Looks incredible.

Him: Tastes like victory.

Him: What's even better is that there isn't a Bojangles in NOVA

Him: Who knows where this came from!!!?

Him: Who cares. 

"Now remember, y'all. DON'T eat me! A mysterious Bojangles blueberry biscuit found in a bar in a town with no Bojangles."

THE NEW BOJANGLES TEMPTATION

You just gotta try it!

(available everywhere that isn't Bojangles)

Weird Bird

Hey, weird bird. Man, you are looking so weird today.

Are you trying to write something on that piece of paper, weird bird? Why does it appear that you've jammed the pencil through the side of your lank, malleable bill? That doesn't seem convenient.

Weird bird, you can't just hop around in an old duffel bag instead of flying. Duffel-locomotion is still severely under researched and under-funded.  

You have too many eyes, pupils, and human-baby-hand-syndrome, weird bird.

I don't know what you're doing all the way over there, weird bird; but I bet it is something that is weird. Maybe you're ordering a special baseball bat made of lead and try to market yourself as a bargain pediatrician for the children of travelling salesman. That's a terrible demographic to cater to, weird bird! You leave those kids alone! They've been through enough.

Now stay in this man's ear and think about what you've done.

Perspectives: What is the key to being grateful?

"I loathe everyone and everything. We are all wretched lizards beneath a god-forsaken rock. One day we will become strong enough to lift the rock and it will crush us and we will be at peace."

"Turkey burgers. Have you tried these, yet? They're shaped just like regular burgers but they come from turkeys. It's a real hoot. If you haven't tried them yet, you should. They just don't stop being incredible!"

"I was, the other day, walking up a street-bo when I--crammt a dollar bull into my sportsweight."

"You know, you just gotta, take the good with the bad and when the good shows up it's like, 'hey! awesome, you're here!" Go outside, find some hay, lay down and take a nap in the sun, you know? Covered in bugs and fleas but alive too!"

"Precious jewels are buried deep beneath the Earth's surface and if we built some kind of subterranean drill-car we could travel down there and scoop them up. When we acquired all of the jewels we could use our power and wealth to divide nations and make them subservient until the Chosen one comes and destroys our empire by taking control of our enormous satellite laser beam."

"Grateful? I'm grateful! I can't stop smiling when I look at you."

As long as you never lose anything ever you'll be just fine. Just fine. 

"I LIKES TO YELL REAL LOUD ALL THE TIME!"

Sketch'um Up Journal of New Place

It's been pretty gross out so these are the areas of New Place that I've spent the most time in so far.

Here's the bed area. Note the window. Very good for seeing how cold and grey it continues to be.

This one is the kitchen. It's a pretty good kitchen.

This is a view from the living room of where my car lives. The man sitting on top of the car is there to inform people that this is not a very good representation of my car. For starts, my car has four doors. But the car that came out of my pen only has one door. 

The obvious.

One of my roommates has this cat. He's a pretty cool cat. I think his name is 'Buster' but I like to just call him 'cat'. *meow*

Lately I feel like I've just been going through the motions of daily stuff. It doesn't feel like there's too much to be excited about. But I think it's pretty normal for a big transition in the butt-end-of-fall December. I remind my self that this is usually about how I feel in situations like this and they always get better.

Yesterday I went shopping and saw this cute girl by the quinoa. She was cuter than as depicted here.

I didn't talk to her because I don't think I've ever talked to any stranger in a grocery store and she probably just wanted to buy some groceries and get on with her life. We smiled at each other though.

After we passed each other I looked back and she pushed off with one foot and rode the cart down the aisle.

Nonverbal Story In the Month of December from a New Place

Mushroom Man (I call him Asbel) finds a Spook'em (called Spook'em) on a floating mountain desert clearing island!

The Adventures of....

THE ADVENTURES OF CURSE BOAT!

Over a month left in the year and I've already tied the number of posts from last year?!

YOU'RE WELCOME!

Orange You Glad I Wasn't Taken Away by the Enemy?

An orange comes of age at a difficult time.

Read this first

(Note: in order to combat the growing sense of futility and despair among the oranges, it was decided that an ever expanding series of walls should be perpetually built around all towns to create a continuous feeling of heightened security and safety.)