The Great Algonquin Skunk Moose

The Monsters of February

This noble and bloodthirsty creature is the Great Algonquin Skunk-Moose of Northern Two-consin.

Although it has the appearance of a three-legged spider with a fist on its butt, grasping at a cheap gold chain it hangs from the Bruffulum trees, it is actually part of the Skunk-Moose family.

There have been several attempts to rename the Great Algonquin Skunk Moose to things such as the Thrider or The Old Birthday's Revenge, but these attempts have failed to catch on because the Skunk-Moose has a surprisingly large advertising budget.

Naturally, the Great Algonquin Skunk-Moose feasts on children and baby lambs, but you should really withhold judgement before learning all of the facts.

The Great Algonquin Skunk-Moose has a supernatural mastery of the elements. The specific sphere of power the Skunk-Moose inhabits is that when you're in a social situation, the GASM will sneak into the room and suddenly make it okay for everyone to talk about their poops. It can lift that inhibition with its presence but after a while, it will wait for the one person who hasn't contributed to the discussion, who looks like they're finally going to have the chance to say something really cathartic. And just when that person is about to speak the GASM flees the room, stifling its tiny laughter with a tiny leg, and immediately makes it not okay to talk about that anymore. Just as the person finishes their exclamation and rises to their feet,

"--LIKE FIVES TIMES YESTERDAY! AM I GONNA DIE OR SOMETHING?"

The Great Algonquin Skunk-Moose wins again. And if you really embarrass yourself, it will rip off your foot in the middle of the night and fill it with candied yams.

Well, that's enough of whatever that was for today. Be wary of people suddenly being cool with talking about their BM's.