I was an angsty boi

low blood sugar, under-slept. today was much better. I actually felt a lot better after my run and then talking to my supervisor we cleared the air a lot.

so everything worked out. haha.

I'm gonna vent and then run

so I got back to work yesterday after a week and a half in costa rica and the first thing I'm told is that my time off request was done wrong and that I accidentally requested off 116 hours instead of 28. which is absurd. And that it couldn't really be fixed.

then I was told that a woman was coming to teach tai chi for an hour to the kids. which changed the schedule and I haven't seen these kids for a week and have no idea how they're going to react or what kind of space they're in. or anything about this and the schedule is getting changed around and all of this was decided without any of my input when I was away.

so I ended up leading the transition and I figured, okay. this is a big group. the schedule is different. I have no idea how this is gonna go. so I offered to the kids to try it for at least 15 minutes and if they really didn't want to do it then they could do homework nearby and out of sight. 

anyway, the class is going well and I have a couple boys who aren't into it and they do 15 minutes and then they do their homework. a few more kids also decide they don't want to do it anymore and they ask to leave too.

overall most of the group stayed and were engaged and did a great job. I felt like it was a pretty big ask for a large group of small children to sit through an hour long tai chi class that they had sprung on them on a monday.

today I go into work and find out that my co teacher went over our boss to our boss's boss and complained that it was disrespectful to the teacher that I let the kids leave the area during the class. so then it filtered back down to me and I felt totally blindsided and really upset.

I do more than pull my weight at my job. I don't deserve to have someone go way over my head instead of speaking to me about how I handled a situation that was completely sprung on me.

it's just really frustrating when negative people use me as an excuse for their own crappy behavior and attitude.

I don't know. The more I think about it, the more complaining isn't going to help anything. it's fine. this miserable person got one over on me. whatever. I'll move on. It's because I left and it created an opening for things to go wrong and then put it back on me.

sometimes I feel like I'm the only person who works there who actually wants to be there and enjoys the kids. 

I won't be taking off any more time so I'll just move forward and keep doing my job.

costa rica

it was a blast!!! I'll post pictures here soon.

I have all of my student comments written except 6th grade

I'll knock those out in the morning.

I think I'm doing well. I feel like I'm doing well. Exciting things are going to happen for me.

me. looking up. optimism. keeping my chin up. excellence.

I need to write my student comments today

 It's the end of the second trimester already and I need to get the report card info ready. It's pretty easy but it does take a while to write comments about 50+ kids. Last time I waited way too long to get it all done so I'm trying to change that this time around. Anyway, here I am stalling. I guess I should get started.

ready...go!

portrait of me! what???

2/5

I don't really know what I want to say

I think I'm a little more stressed at afterschool than normal. Some of the kids have been a little off. A little more aggressive with each other. I'd like to work on staying calm and having the right energy because if I get upset, they definitely get upset. So I'm gonna work on that.

I also had an idea for these cards that I made for a game. I don't think I'm going to play it again but it would be a really nice art piece if I arranged them all on a large board. I think I'll do that.

I had an idea for another picture/painting during my run. There's this guy called Stilts Walker who has been posting drawings of hotdogs all over Charlottesville. I'm gonna make a crazy looking hotdog and put some alien letters underneath it and then beneath that have a translation that says , who is stilts walker. and give it away on craigslist.

that's all for now.