you got sauce

 I'm gonna invent a restaurant called 'you got sauce' and what it is is we slowly collect sauces from other places, just like extra sauces. We start a campaign where people go through their junk drawers full of unused sauces and clean out their cars of sauce and we'll take 'em. We'll take all the sauces. And then if get food from a food place and come to our restaurant we'll give you sauce. And you're like 'why can't I just get sauce from the place I got the food from?' Well, we will pay you to take our sauce. That we got for free. That you gave us. What we'll do is we'll find all the prices from stuff from the 90s and we'll pay you enough to make what you ordered cost the 90s prices. And throw in sauce too. No if you give us the sauce. If you give us the sauce we'll pay you enough to make it a 90s price. Because 'you got sauce.' And then you can hang out in the lounge and watch ads and create conversational content for other patrons and just hang out there and watch ads. 

One thing I think that doesn't get talked enough about with collecting data is that's stupid and my data is worthless. I don't care about my data. I don't care about what I do on the internet. No meaningful information can be extracted from that that will make you money. It just won't. Look at my credit card bills. I buy gas every 2 months and groceries once a week. That's all I spend money on. What does 'sell my data' mean? My data about what? To whom? For what? That doesn't mean anything.

And maybe this makes me sound misinformed and bitter for no reason but I really think we should just all consider this information useless and stop propping up this awful idea of a business model. Some dumb little robot following me around all day and then going back to some weird guy in a tower, 'oh guess what your wickedness today he watched a video of a guying singing a song about talking on the phone and it made him sad'

'MWAhaHAHA EXCELLENT! I HAVE A BAGILLION DOLLARS NOW AND PULL THE STRINGS OF SOCIETY!'

what are we doing?