Beard Poem 4

Beards! Beards! Beards! Beards! Beards!
Melanie had heard from an old talking toad
that the way to the dragon was down Blubbergum Road.
And there, on the road, was the first enemy she faced.
It was the Blunnnnghderous Blechhh from Outer Space.
He said, "Puny Beard Warrior, prepare to be erased.
I'll crush you and smush you and I will leave no trace."

Beards! Beards! Beards! Beards! Beards!
The Blunnnnghderous Blechhh was a gruesome sight to behold.
A tall, fat, mean, greasy monster dripping with mold.
He lurched at Melanie with his Spicy Skunk Fist
but Melanie's reflexes made the blow miss.
The Blech laughed, "Haha! You'll never suspect this!"
And he unleashed his Deadly Fuzzy Lip Kiss!

Beards! Beards! Beards! Beards! Beards!
Oh! Melanie gagged and choked and her lips were burning,
she was sick to her stomach and her breakfast was churning.
"You are a gross, slobbish, pig!" Melanie said with disdain.
"With stanky stank breath and a head with no brain!"
And Melanie's righteous scolding the Blech with great guilt-pains.
He fled weeping and sobbing while Melanie, standing strong, remained.

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And then that happened.