Head on a Thread

About Working:

Hello! In this segment I'll be sharing some thoughts on a topic I have chosen and feel that I can speak upon. The topic and thoughts have also been inspired by the picture that hangs ominously above this text.

It is of a human head--caught in an expression of bug-eyed surprise and/or horror and/or awe. It is a severed head. A bodyless head which hangs upon a string that is attached to a magical cloud one thousand feet in the air. The red and yellow color clouds or AURAS surrounding the head are reminiscent of a McDonald's food restaurant and beckons one to think, "I. am. loving. it."

I have some experience working. Not much. But some. And as far as I can see it, the coolest job in the whole universe would be to have heat-ray vision. You could use it to light hay on fire. You could use it to melt asphalt on the road. The uses are basically innumerable. A young child with a positive attitude and the ability to excite particles of matter until they ignite using only their brain and special corneas deserves all the success they will undoubtedly receive.

HOWEVER, it must be exceedingly obvious that, at the very most, only six people in the world at any given moment will possess this ability. What are the rest of us supposed to do?

And though the following advice may seem sparse and opaque, I assure you that it is the truest sentiment, expressed in the simplest, most complete way:

"Take a whole bunch of dead animal carcasses, put them in a burlap sack, and leave the sack on top of a slide at a local elementary school playground."

Truth is beauty and beauty is a well-executed plan.

Done and done.