Those Valar-Bro Nerd Jerks created the Sun and Moon. Melkor is not pleased!
But Melkor hated the new lights, and was for a while confounded by this unlooked-for stroke of the Valar. Then he assailed Tilion (the Moon) sending spirits of shadow against him...but the Moon was victorious.
...for as he grew in malice...he himself became ever more bound to the earth..unwilling to issue from his dark strongholds...and the lands near his dwelling were shrouded in fumes and great clouds...
"Or I could create a larger, more powerful Moon to eat this Moon--the MELKOON! With lots of cool horns and skulls!
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