Cool Drinks Summer Drop Calls

Time Pigs and TJ

This is a historical comic about how people in the past didn't know what to call Thomas Jefferson's time-travelling television set so they called it a time pig instead because it was the closest approximation to a television set that they had available.

I Should Be Excited About This

Live in all the times. Past, Present, and Future. Why choose just one?

Bad bad Box

a bad box yo!

Chilly Creepy

Stink funk face. For the grungy times.

Rairnsday

That's the best analogy I've made so far in the 2014.

rug dealers. dealers of rugs.

Fake etymology

rug

comes from the word 'rag'.

which is short for 'ragamuffin.'

which is a kind of muffin.

OAR Chapter 3

In an ongoing effort to make the content of this blog applicable to a circle of people no larger than myself, this is the first installment of my series where I rewrite and illustrate the entirety of John L. Parker Jr.'s cult running classic, Once a Runner.

We begin with chapter 3, The Morning Run, where we find our young protagonist, Quentin Cassidy, in the clutches of a night-ish mare. In this reoccurring dream, Cassidy is being passed by everyone around him at the end of a race and his legs refuse to respond. A truly hellish experience that is almost too great for the diehard-runner Cassidy to endure. Fortunately, he awakens. The author describes Cassidy's physical appearance and his room. He is tall and built fast with upside-down teardrops for legs. His door makes fun of Rudyard Kipling and says that he was slow and probably a racist.  Cassidy laces up his shoes and heads out for his morning run. He is a miler.

In the Smallways

Wall-eyed.

Also known as

strabismus

also known as

heterotropia

---your eyes ain't facing the same way!

NOT BE CONFUSED WITH

HETEROTOPIA

topos- place

hetero- other.

It's an other place.

Some man named Michel Foucalt said it means places that exist physically and mentally.

Like the 'place' where a phone call takes place.

I don't really understand it but I liked it because it had that root 'topos'.

Is a classroom a heterotopia? Prolly. 

Honor 'Mongst Men!

I swear to Josie I really saw this happen this weekend, you guys. Blindfolded numbers swinging wooden bats at each other in the Food Lion parking lot for blood sport.

There wasn't even an audience or bets being taken. They were just doing it for the thrill the way I put my frozen burritos in the microwave and set the cook time for 17 minutes.

ALTERCATION

 noun.

a noisy quarrel or disagreement, especially in public.

from the verb- altercate.

FROM THE LATIN-- ALTERCAT! which means 'wrangled'.

New Feline Anti-Hero: ALTER-CAT! He stops racists by turning into various races and twisting their hate back on them TENFOLD with justice and understanding!

SHARBROKS!

Denternity.

a word I just made up.

noun.

A group of teeth sharing a common profession or interest

OR

teeth forever.

Internet's Busted Yo

Work harder, you!

I Wouldn't Be Twice This Much Otherwise

Did you know that 'loafing' (idling one's time away) comes from 'loafer' which comes from the german word 'Landlaufer' which means 'tramp' and the 'lauf' part comes from the german verb 'lofen' which means to RUN!

Unsubstantiated Theory: every word comes back to running.

Space Captain-Dad 2.0 Versus the Aliens!

The adventures will almost be too exciting to pay me twenty dollars for!

Woodsing Free

sylvan

adjective.

consisting or associated with woods; wooded.

Latin. silva. wood----> Silvanus. woodland deity.

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traipse

verb

walk about casually or needlessly

GOOGLE HAS NO IDEA WHERE THIS WORD COMES FROM!

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"bleeehh! I'm the grossest nosest!"

Not Alone

 2 Things On Friendships and Being Alone

My great good friend Anthony Todd once said, "It's better to live with people than to live with (only) yourself."

That is true.

And Reggie Watts once said, "Friends, above all relationships, are incredibly important and if you have a friend remember to always love that friend because that friend is going to be there."

And that is also true.

And I'm thankful for the friends I've had and the people who have allowed me to not be alone and I really needed them and I thank them right now. 

And this is sort of a weird thing to be saying but it shouldn't be because being thankful is a great thing to be and if you have thankful thoughts you should just spray them on the internet walls.

The picture is unrelated. Sort of. Don't be asleep to the needs of others (?) Sometimes. Sometimes being asleep is helpful. I'd be lying if I said this wasn't partly driven by a sense of guilt.

guilt

noun

From Old English gylt.

unknown origin!

"WAKE UP MR. WEST!"

People Underestimate Chicken Glasses

paucity.

noun.

the presence of something only in small amounts; scarcity.

Latin. paucus. few.

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I don't know about you reader but I was taught that it's Fire Safety Approved to close your door when you go to bed at night. And I do that. But what that means is that every morning you have to make the choice to open that door and let everything that shifted under the cover of night rush in with the light and grab hold of you tight.

And there's a lot of different emotions that you can feel about that. Relief, anxiety, laziness, reluctance, despair, hope, it's a lot of weird stuff coming hard and fast and what you make of it may ultimately define who you are as a person. Is that fair? Maybe. Probably.

This isn't supposed to be a hopeful thing. Or empowering. If it was that I'd say something like 'Never be ashamed! Life's too short! No regrets!'

Never be ashamed?

That doesn't make any sense. Sure you can be ashamed. It's something you can feel, right? Sure there's stuff you can be ashamed about. It's a completely valid way to feel.  Even if it's under the guise of good or positive intentions, making broad, sweeping value judgments about feelings is a pretty dangerous and messed up thing to do.

Am I ashamed of this drawing? Sure I am. Look at it. It's awful. It's a mess. I should feel bad that I made such a terrible thing and put it on the Internet forever. But I don't feel bad about feeling bad about it.

I feel great about feeling bad about it! What a wonderful gift to have! A terrible thing that I made and I hate. I tried to share information with the world and it dribbled out of my head in an unwieldy messy way and affirms that I am human and that you can strive to be better than this without even having to strive very hard. Aren't those the best teachers? The things we look at and say, "Well, I know I could do better than that. There's no chance I'll fail so I'm just gonna go for it." We just kinda tumble over that bar that's so low we only have to trip over it. And then we're on our way!

Yes we need high expectations but we can't meet them in one giant leap. It's a crumbling, janky, jerky, jutty staircase to the top. Or middle. Or bottom. Or wherever.

Low Fi

convergent vs. divergent.

vergere- Latin. to turn or incline

dis- in two ways

con- together.

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So, if a person were to continue making these one panel cartoons with caption things and each one was made without any attempt to directly build upon on another, would they continue to become more irreconcilable and more diverse and more chaotic....or, if it went on indefinitely, would enough points of connection be created so that they could be arranged in some kind of logical story arc with a clear beginning, middle, and end.

Or would it oscillate between sense and nonsense?

I don't know. I'mma keep doing it.

That's Where I Got My Style From

FLIMFLAM

noun

-nonsensical or insincere talk

   -a confidence game.

verb

-swindle (someone) with a confidence game.

Etymology- a "symbolic reduplication" (says Google)

I thought it would have come from the word flimsy but it turns out it might be the other way around. Flimsy comes from flimflam.

FLIMFLAM!

Gigantic Beast

Man, that is a weird statement.

Monster.

noun.

From Latin- monere 'warn' to monstrum 'portent or monster'.

Robot

noun.

CZECH!! That's a new language for these!

robota- FORCED LABOR!

First used in a play by Karel Capek called Rossum's Universal Robots! Or Rosumovi Univerzalni Roboti.

See, you guys? Robots have always been hilarious.

Automaton

Greek.

automatos- acting of itself.

Math Dragons

xeno- relating to a foreigner or foreigners.

topos (which I've already defined!)- place

XENOTOPIA!

-a foreign place?

Did you know that the parts of utopia are 'ou' meaning 'not' and topos.

So it's a 'not place'.

But you'd think it would be 'eu' meaning 'well'. A 'good place'.

That would make sense with dystopia. With 'dys' meaning bad.

What other kinds of topias can there be?

A homotopia. A same place.

Or a logotopia. A word/ reason place.

Or a Barbatopia. A Barbara place.

Or an androtopia- A man place.

Or a dentopia. A tooth place.

A ketchutopia. A ketchup place.

All different kinds of places.

Cookies and Pestilence

"But I wanted the cookies!"

Pestilence- noun.

-a fatal epidemic disease.

From the Latin pestis meaning plague.

Cookie- noun

- a small sweet cake, typically round, flat, and crisp.

From the Dutch koekje which means 'little cake'.